Getting partner involved

I am sorry for being stroppy earlier. I am really upset about all this, plus someone at work shouted at me for something which was not my fault. I should have waited til I had calmed down really.

I have already mentioned that I am struggling here. It is not really helpful to say it is all down to me. I have zero support on this. I was looking for some here but the consensus seems to be I should do it all by myself. I CAN'T do this. I have felt like crying all day. But I will have to do it all alone as I always have. I am just so tired of fighting this every day and was looking for a way to get some small amount of support. But as it is all down to me I guess I can't have that.

Hi Lizzie,

Maybe your local diabetes nurses could help you out - try making an appointment to speak with them to look at how you could work on some of the issues you've mentioned already...and then when you get an appointment take your partner along too so that he will hopefully understand a bit more about what you're trying to deal with and how it's affecting you, and how he might be able to help or support you. I'm sure the nurses will have a lot of experience of not only what you want to get help with, but also working with the partners of diabetics to explain things to them and get them involved.

You could also try taking your partner to GP appointments to discuss your diabetes/other related issues, or go and see your practice nurse together.

Check with your GP or local PCT if there are 'Health Trainers' (or a similar service) in your area - they are there to help people to live a healthier lifestyle and will understand a bit (maybe not DAFNE though) about diabetes. They would be able to work with you and your partner to change whatever you want.

I hope any or all of the above ideas might help - you need to be motivated to improve things for yourself, but you clearly are! You're not alone and there are people who should be able to help you; hopefully with a bit of extra support you'll be able to make a real difference.

Good luck and let us know how you get on

Hey Lizzie,

My boyfriend supports me in these ways:
~ Whenever he's the one to prepare food, he's keen to let me know how many CPs are in what he has made.

~ Whenever I'm upset (caused by high or low) or unsure about what has happened with my BG levels, I let my boyfriend give his thoughts on it. I have made sure to introduce him to DAFNE the best I can and thankfully for the situation he loves working stuff out mathematically so sometimes he brings light to a dark puzzle.

~ My boyfriend is pescetarian which encourages a healthier eating lifestyle, on top of my own attempts at healthy eating (from being diabetic since the age of 5 it's always something I've aimed for). He has however never stopped me from eating meat.

~ Thankfully, neither of us drink or smoke.

~ It's yet to be tested but he has said that he's prepared to inject me if I am unable to do it myself - or do a blood test!

To be honest, I am very thankful for my chap. Almost every boyfriend I had before was just not interested, or if they were, I didn't have something as valuable as DAFNE to help explain it to them so they can help me if needed. I'm so glad that I can explain it to him much better than I could before. It makes a world of difference. He's also great for bringing me back when I get flustered - for example, if I have a hypo, sometimes if I don't know why it happened, I try to work it out there and then. The boyfriend slows me down so I can recover first lol.

Have a look at your life and the stuff that affects your diabetes and see if there are ways that your partner is happy to share with you. He's probably fully well aware that you're keen to keep your independence considering how you've been so far, so a good chat about it may be in order.

Best of luck Lizzie. I'm sure something can be arranged - even if it's just someone to talk to when your diabetes gets you down (ah another one mine does for me too!)

JWo said:
Hey Lizzie,

My boyfriend supports me in these ways:
~ Whenever he's the one to prepare food, he's keen to let me know how many CPs are in what he has made.

~ Whenever I'm upset (caused by high or low) or unsure about what has happened with my BG levels, I let my boyfriend give his thoughts on it. I have made sure to introduce him to DAFNE the best I can and thankfully for the situation he loves working stuff out mathematically so sometimes he brings light to a dark puzzle.

~ My boyfriend is pescetarian which encourages a healthier eating lifestyle, on top of my own attempts at healthy eating (from being diabetic since the age of 5 it's always something I've aimed for). He has however never stopped me from eating meat.

~ Thankfully, neither of us drink or smoke.

~ It's yet to be tested but he has said that he's prepared to inject me if I am unable to do it myself.

To be honest, I am very thankful for my chap. Almost every boyfriend I had before was just not interested, or if they were, I didn't have something as valuable as DAFNE to help explain it to them so they can help me if needed. I'm so glad that I can explain it to him much better than I could before. It makes a world of difference. He's also great for bringing me back when I get flustered - for example, if I have a hypo, sometimes if I don't know why it happened, I try to work it out there and then. The boyfriend slows me down so I can recover first lol.

I'm nearing the end of my DAFNE course and it's clear to me that one of my big problems was that I was getting my CP estimations wrong but was blundering through because I had a ratio that seemed to work. Now that I'm calculating the correct CP values my ratio is different and I hope to level out my peaks and troughs in BG readings (I'm even getting the terminololgy now).

The course is excellent but is targeting the diabetics only, is there any support for their partners (or other family members) to provide them with an understanding of the principles and the CP estimating. For us we're already putting it into practice but it's not as "real" for them.

As diabetics the course brings us together and we can share experiences and learn from this, is there an equivalent for our partners? Should there be a 1 day course for partners of diabetics?

I've been using the DAFNE iPod/iPhone Application for months now but until I started the course I had no idea why it was structured as it is and am coming across features that support the principles all the time. Imagine how much more difficult DAFNE would be to understand coming to it completely cold.

...Mark R (soon to be DAFNE graduate)

Congrats when the graduation comes..............


I am not aware of any information for partners, but the best thing to do is for you to teach your partner, and to get them involved at meal times...............its not the same in all house holds but my wife cooks and makes my lunch, lucky I know............but through this routine and letting time do the work, she knows as much as I do when it comes to counting carbs............

but after 2 years of doing it, I can tell how many carbs are in the food I eat without looking at the packaging...............

time will do all the work.......

Haven't been on here for a while but thought I would share our conversation last week

Me: My blood's low

Him: Do you have ketones

By the way many congrats on your marriage novarapidboi (Amy and I both on pump as of last Monday hope you get one soon).

Thanks...............it seems like so long ago now, loving married life though..........

So who was that conversation with?

novorapidboi26 said:
Thanks...............it seems like so long ago now, loving married life though..........

So who was that conversation with?