Diabetic jokes

A diabetic called Rab caught the flu
A condition, for him, that was new
His doctor said 'Rab -
You missed your flu-jab
That's really important for you'.

There once was a diabetic called Evans
Whose BGs were all fours to sevens
His partner, said 'Dai -
You know that's a lie -
You're not going to get to Heaven'.

There was a diabetic called Wood
Who had a weakness for the occasional sponge pud
But she exercised and injected
And tested and corrected
To ensure her control was still good!

Romance is in the air:

There once was a diabetic called Hector
Whose control was in the 'bad' sector,
So after much thought
Twas DAFNE he sought
Now he loves her and will never reject her.

There once was a diabetic called Jack
Whose approach to diabetes was slack
He was sent on a course
With DAFNE, of course
Now he says that he'll never look back.

There was a diabetic from Penzance
Whose control was much left to chance
So then DAFNE took over
He thought 'I just love her'
So this was the start of a romance.

A diabetic from across the Atlantic
Had control that made him quite frantic,
To DAFNE he was sent
A week with her he spent
Now he loves her - it's really romantic.

Diabetes can cause you some stress -
When the carbs in a meal you just guess.
But DAFNE can assist
And with its carbohydrate list
You're soon on the road to success.

A diabetic from somewhere in Surrey
Was in a bit of a hurry
'I skipped my first test'
He later confessed
After a hypo had caused colleagues to worry.

A lady diabetic called Rose
Once gave herself the wrong QA dose
From the hypo - she recovered
But in sweat she was smothered
And had a feeling that was very morose.

Hickory dickory dock , I prick my fingers til there hard as a rock , my machine says 252 oh what to do I wish I can dump dis decease of at the next block......

One Fish Two Fish Red Fish Blue Fish
DAFNE lets me consume a dish
of pasta, rice, muesli or bread
Prior to DAFNE I was off my head

My wife recently found out she suffers from both diabetes and hay fever.

I have tried to cheer her up by sending gifts, you know; flowers, chocolates.

Very good to the OP's I only got a one liner but it's good....
They say laughter is the best medicine
But for diabetics my doctor recommends insulin